Sunday, 25 January 2015

Struggling to Strike Out

Kate has returned with her fabulous link up Striking Mums which really does bring us Mums together despite our very different journeys and different needs of support. Although I didn't participate much last year because of well, I'm not actually sure why, but I hope to be more involved this year anyway.

As the title says I'm struggling. I have so very much to be thankful for and believe me I am thankful everyday, but at the moment I just can't pick myself up. I keep drifting off thinking about the person and parent I used to be and disliking the one I am today. I am always tired. I am lazy. I am selfish in that I prefer to do my things than do the things my children find fun. I hardly bake. I feel the pressure of my children growing and knowing soon they will be there in school and I will be all alone and need to fill my time but I am too anxious to volunteer or get a job. I am gaining weight so quick and have no motivation to lose it yet hate the feeling of carrying this bloated body around.

January has floored me to be honest. My daughters birthday was a lovely occasion, my husband's family breakfast on his birthday was lovely. Seeing some friends this month was nice and happy mail has kept me going but I have day after day after day of pain or discomfort for 3 weeks now since the dentist did work on one tooth. It grinds you down feeling like this. I feel totally unappreciated at home and I am so sick of the bloody school runs, the same roads, the same battles with the toddler, the same parents I am invisible to day in day out.

Usually when I write these posts I like to inspire others but this time I have nothing to give. I always bounce back from dark moments and this moment will be no exception. Sorry I'm not so striking this week xx

Kate on thin Ice Striking Mums

10 comments:

  1. Mate, I'm sorry to hear you feel this way. I can tell from the way you've written this post you're just completely deflated. If you look through my blog I felt the same over Xmas, it becomes so tough to do even the simplest things.
    I hope this is just a Christmas comedown, a short phase. Reach out to us bloggers for help and motivation, you'll see you're not alone in feeling like this.
    Hope you're OK, Ally x
    #StrikingMums

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  2. come on we can get through this x Hoping Striking Mums plus my Reasons to be Cheerful hop will cheer us up in 201

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  3. Sometimes these posts can be more inspiring and helpful to know that someone else out there feels the same way you do so you're a little less lonely.

    And when you do bounce back, which I am sure you will, link back to this and remember how strong you are and how far you come each day xxx

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  4. I already attempted to do this once, so it might be duplicated as I am not having a good technology day!

    You may think that your post is not inspiring, I disagree, your honesty about things that get each and every one of us down is inspiring, the fact that you are showing other people who might feel like this that they are not alone helps reduce that lonely feeling, that is inspiring. And the fact that you say you know you will bounce back, that in itself is inspiring!

    I just wanted you to know that x

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  5. Oh Hannah, I'm sorry you're feeling like this at the moment. I think it is inspiring to write such an honest post, life isn't always cupcakes and Roses. I hope you are feeling a bit better soon x

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  6. Sorry to hear this, I too have been very down in the dumps and really lacking motivation and energy, what you have written about preferring to do you own things etc is really real to me too as that is exactly how I have been feeling lately. I have also been diving into any food that is bad for me and not eating enough fruit and veg (which probably isn't helping the lack or energy thing but I am constantly hungry for the rubbish stuff) I hope your tooth pain sorts itself out-that really can't be nice! And just wishing you well as sometimes I know when you are feeling down like that it can feel like you are the only one feeling that way-just to assure you, you really aren't! xx

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  7. Oh Hannah. Massive hugs.
    I cant relate and empathise on all levels.
    I just hope the longer days so much needed sunshine.
    Will help.

    Much love from us all.
    Sa xXx

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  8. Empathise with so many of your feelings not now but certainly when mine were smaller and even not that long ago. Parenting is hard and society still seems to put the heavy load mainly on mums. Could you write down how you feel so unappreciated and show it to the relevant person/people? Volunteering would be great for you - not all but more organisations know all too well people who volunteer are real and perhaps have vulnerability too - if anything that tends to make them better volunteers as they reach out to others better. I love that you know you will come out of this dark time and I am over the moon to have such a special woman as part of #strikingmums

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  9. Ah so sad you feel like the weather and dark afternoons don't help do they, maybe you should set aside some time for you if thats at all possible? Hope you are feeling better soon x

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  10. So sad to read this: sending lots of positive vibes your way, and really hope that you can get that dental pain sorted out quickly, hopefully then you will start to feel a bit better about life in general x

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