One month ago we got given our notice to leave the house I'm now spending my last night in. The children are finally sound asleep, I've just said goodnight to Mr B and had my last ever shower in the house I've actually grown to love and even call home despite its obvious short falls and need for care I can't quite give it.
Little A was 2 years old when we arrived here, Midge was 5. That makes it feel even longer. I remember first seeing this place and being unsure because I always get anxious when moving, usually I'm paranoid about our future neighbours. We've become close to our neighbour who is sad to see us go which is nice considering I'd thought he'd be pleased to not hear my fish wife voice and the kids screaming and stamping! Apparently he's as gutted as us which is nice really.
There are things I won't miss; like the open planned downstairs which I've never been a fan of in any house, the wallpapers and old carpet on the stairs but that's very little. I'll miss the amazing view from the attic window, the noise of the rain as I relax in my bed. I'll miss the children having their own space and the big back garden.
Everything happened so fast with leaving this place. It's only now I spend my last night here reflecting on my home that I realise how much it meant to me. We had kind landlords, good neighbours, plenty of room, we could decorate and do whatever we liked and never had an inspection.
The new house is okay. I know it can't possibly feel like home until everything is inside and sorted but it doesn't feel the same this time. Sure I can picture myself happy in the kitchen and enjoying some peace in my bedroom. I'm sure the children will actually share perfectly well all in all and hopefully we can make it warm and cosy. It's the asking permission for every little thing, taking photos of a wall you want to hang a photo of your children on so the landlord can okay it first and the 3 monthly inspections that stop me feeling any homely feeling towards this new place. These things have to be done but I've never experienced them before and it feels like a huge deal to me, a private person, to have someone look around the home every 3 months to make sure you're being good...
This is all just ramblings. We will be happy and we will be okay. Inspections are normal and over and done with in minutes if you're being good tenants and there's no problems to report. I know all this, I guess I'm just a little sad tonight.
Here Little A had his first big boy bed. Midge had her room decorated the way she's always wanted it and I'll never forget the look on her face. We've had some fab birthday parties. We'd put Santa footprints all over the laminate because it was easier to clean and the children loved it. We brought Peppa to live with us here and my 2 lovely hamsters are buried in the back garden. Midge used her money to buy a big trampoline which has seen a lot of fun but sadly has to be left behind. I've locked myself out on a number of occasions and had some fun trying to get back in over the gate covered in brambles and by sticking my arm through a cat flap to unlock the back door! We've lost first teeth, had many a wonderful BBQ out the back. We've had sensory break throughs, great games of hide and seek and so much more. They are the memories of Number 47 and now we must embrace and enjoy the new house...our new home for as long as we are lucky to call it that.