N is for Need for Change
I'm going through this phase at the moment where it feels like the walls are closing in on me, that nothing is simple or tidy or in its place. That everything is a mess (not just in the home) I feel I'm not being the best Mother, the best wife. All those stupid things we feel. I don't think I'm rubbish at anything I do, I just don't believe right now I'm giving it my all.
I am in need of change. I need to change how I think about things. I have to change how I deal with situations that arise in the family home. Why add more shouting to the bickering? Why hold a grudge just because Husband didn't cook you a meal? Why upset the atmosphere for something so stupid?
I need to change my diet. My health is not going so great at the moment. I know what's wrong with me, I have digestive 'issues' which cause me grief sometimes for a whole 2 weeks! I need to find a good diet, a healthy one but not too healthy because that actually causes me more problems! I need to cut down on the junk, go back to baking. Exercise! Dammit, how hard is it to do a quick workout?
I need to have more time for me. I haven't been on a charity scavenger hunt in ages. I have only tonight managed to paint my nails a lovely colour of pink and it's taken me a month! So at this rate it'll be another month before I get to tame these eyebrows of mine!
I'm the only one who can sort these things. I wish I had more support but do you know what? I can paint a room and put up photos and you never know, I may even risk everything by watching a few 'DIY how to drill' you tube videos! I'm the only who can put the right food in my mouth and get up to work out.
I have an eye test appointment this week to see if I need new glasses and to find out if there's anything going on 'behind the scenes' because they've been a bit weird lately! I'm enduring the dentist on Wednesday which is awful but ultimately a good thing, get a check up, fill a filling and go home pain free *Hurrah!* Lastly, I have finally booked an appointment with a local Osteopath to sort this back of mine out because in all honesty it is really, really hurting and I'm getting fed up of late nights, pain killers and hot water bottles.
Do you need to change anything? Are you putting it off?