Sunday, 28 September 2014

Striking Mums- We're all Different

Kate has been taking a number of fellow mums through a striking mums journey. I have been reading her posts, I have been viewing the link ups of fellow bloggers and leaving comments when I have managed to. As you can see this is my first post for Striking Mums, for some reason over the last few weeks I just haven't been able to put into words how I feel about certain topics and questions. They've all been very inspiring posts that Kate has written and I decided to think more privately but now my blogging mojo has returned, I'm ready to join Kate and the other wonderful mothers. I start with Kate's questions on being different.

1. Are you different and, if so, how?

I'm one of these people that believe we are all very different. We are all here for a reason. I'm included in that. I can't tell you my reason, not accurately but I'm different in that I am a lot, lot more sensitive than a lot of people and I look at the story behind a person. I think a lot before I speak, before I act and I always want to make people feel better. I'm not perfect and especially with my family I can be bad tempered and quick to snap. My difference is my reason to be here, to help people in some way. I'm sure one day it'll maybe become a career.

2. Do you celebrate your uniqueness or strive to fit in?

I suppose I celebrate it in a way. I love to share random acts of kindness and tend to show what I've done in regards to that. Not for the self gratification but in the hope I can inspire further acts of kindness. Otherwise I don't really. I hate that I'm super sensitive, I don't particularly like that I'm an introvert and never go to my husbands football team get togethers despite them all being lovely people. But I can't change, really I can't. There's a block there and in some moments I kind of realise I wouldn't want to be very social. I love that I seek joy in a hot chocolate, a large duvet and a phone call/DVD reading or letter writing.

3. Are you ever judgemental of other mums who are different from you? Answer honestly even if only in your own head.

In general I am not someone who severely judges another person.
If you know me in person you would know I have a thing for a group of mothers at school. I don't dislike them, in fact I do not know them but they do not let many penetrate their tight knit group, they come across as rude and fairly self indulged. I have made judgments on those mothers and I have no doubt in my mind they have their own towards me and all the other mothers they won't look at let alone speak to. I'm sure they are very nice people, but perhaps I am not one of 'their' people.

4. What would you like to be different about you?

I'd like to take things to heart less, it's incredibly frustrating and draining but I don't really know how to not be affected by other people's words. I also worry that I would lose a part of myself and be less caring and understanding.

5. Have you ever being attacked or bullied for being different? How did that affect you?

The biggest difference I have and always have had is a physical difference. I've written before about excessive blushing, it's very painful for me and my bullying started at 9 years old. I was made to feel uncomfortable in my first two years at secondary and was bullied again at age 14 which started off a very rebellious phase for me, hiding my anxieties and acting out. I guess I gave myself a false confidence and in a bad way. I didn't use it for my education that's for sure! It has affected me to this day and whilst I have done things I am incredibly proud of there are loads of things I can't do because I'm just too scared.

6. If you had to write an advert for yourself as a limited edition ,what would you say to make people think you were great?

Like everyone else I don't feel I can find any words to answer this question! It's much easier to hear great things from your loved ones and friends but to 'big yourself up' feels some what difficult, I wonder why that is?

Please join Kate and Striking Mums here:

Kate on thin Ice Striking Mums


13 comments:

  1. welcome to the group!! It is hard some times to actually public state some of these things. It can be so empowering though

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    1. Thanks Becky! I agree, quite freeing too :)

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  2. I used to blush excessively as a teenager too, but luckily I just grew out of it, but it was horrible at the time x

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    1. I'm so glad you grew out of it, my mum still suffers and she's in her fifties. Her confidence has changed though, it's very deep for me. Thanks for your comment x

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  3. I still blush terribly, I have learnt to embrace it, however, I wasn't bullied for it. For your ad, I would say: Has the biggest heart xxxx

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    1. If I wasn't bullied I wonder if I'd pay so much attention to it? Interesting. I'm pleased you could embrace blushing! Thank you I love that ad!

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  4. You sound very sensitive and a caring person, I am sorry you had to put up with bullying as a girl, I can understand how you felt as I experienced something similar x

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    1. I'm sorry you also experienced bullying, can really stay with you xx

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  5. Ah you sound so lovely, I to am affected by things others say, so silly but things like that bother me and i take then to heart x

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  6. I take things to heart too much but I find that I am becoming a little desensitised as I get older. You sound like a lovely person, love the fact you're happy with a duvet and hot chocolate! My kinda girl ;)

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  7. Hannah - so sorry it has taken me so long to read this because I am thrilled to have you in the #strikingmums community. Lots of people read and don't join in and over the years (I started the forerunner to this in 2011 as Grooving Mums later Groovy Mums) people have spoken to me about how they prefer to read and reflect quietly and privately and that is fine. Striking Mums is there for individuals to use as they see fit. However, I am so pleased to have you along as you have so much to give and I think to learn too. That is the joy of it all. Well, I know you are lovely so I am sure I could write a brilliant advert for you, I share many of your character traits and used to have the blushing thing too. Have you read "Quiet" on introversion - I found that the most helpful thing as it allows you to celebrate being an introvert. Also the old fave "Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway" has helped me at many times in life. As you get older and you do things, it gets easier and honestly I am and was the most scaredy cat in the world. Have a lovely weekend

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    1. Thank you Kate such wonderful words. I have one if those books but would be keen to find the other, it sounds good! It always surprises me when I write these posts how people seem to understand what you're going through because they're there now or have been there. Very inspiring thank you x

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  8. Fab post! I'm also very sensitive, a bit too much of an introvert - I always want to go out but am paralysed by fear before I go!

    Groups of mums can sometimes be the most intimidating and confusing people in the world. Hoping there is less mystery by the time my boys start school :)

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