Thursday, 6 October 2011

Life Circle Week One -The Life Circle

I've decided to join in with a group of lovely people over at The Five Fs Blog where 'The Life Circle' Is being put into action! Anyone who knows me knows I have had recently finished counselling for anxiety, mainly social anxiety. Although I feel good about being signed off, as I wouldn't be signed off if not, I have noticed things start to..'dip' shall we say. I'm hoping now with a group of others whose aims will be slightly different but overall on the same page, with changing how we live.

So to start, over at The Five Fs, a 'Wheel Of Life' has been created. This wheel is designed for you to plot where you feel your life currently lies in 8 different areas of your life, thus giving you the key to see where improvments can be made with simple ideas, support and small steps.

The one simple 'rule' (guideline) I must remember to stick to is not to be too negitive. I'm sure many people are willing to shoot themselves down and I certainetly am one of them. Fortunetly I did learn a lot from my counselling sessions, and thinking more positively is actually a perfect start to looking towards the things you want to change. So here is my 'The Wheel Of Life' without the picture as for some reason having real trouble adding my photos tonight.

Career- This is put down as a 4 simply because I have never worked a day in my life. I met my partner when I attended college and fell pregnant young at 17. I had my daughter at 18 but me and my partner lived together between both of our parents. We decided to move and have another child when i was 20, so turning 21 I had our son, our second child. Partner works but I chose to be a stay at home. The only reason this is not lower is because I do now know (finally) what it is I want to do, but finacial reasons prevent me from jumping straight in and doing my courses...but at least i KNOW. Perhaps with some confidence building I could do some voluntry work  in my local charity shop, something for the CV after all.

Health- 6- I am overall happy with my health in terms of I have no dreadful illnesses I have to live with. I get constant colds but this is something that I have always had trouble with and perhaps a few vitamins would be good. I hardly exercise though so this is something key I want to change. I am lazy with my diet in terms of I have so many food restrictions that I find it difficult to think of meals for every week, then theres being to tired to even bother with more than toast after the children are down!

Personal Development-5- Perhaps this score would be higher say 2 or 3 months ago when I felt quite confident. Since then I have encountered pushy mother at the library group I went to and no longer feel happy to go there (plus i have a nearly 4 year old and they all have babies). I don't think I have quite put my finger on it but just now my confidence isn't particully high and I find my on/off anxitey rears its head often causing me to cancel things last minuet or deciding at the last second not to do something! However, for me, realising all this is development in itself and it probably requires a bit more support perhaps, something I shall look into.

Friends and Family-6-More of a 6 on a friends basis. My parents do not live far away. I see my mum weekly as she works a lot but I don't get to see my Dad as often because neither of us drives and the buses are expensive. However, when we do see eachother we do have a good catch up. I prefer to be with my own little family which I am perfectly content with, I am not a very people person no matter who the people are! This though is something that runs down the genes on one side or the other! Friends are few and far between. I do not mind meeting people as such but have learnt quickly that I am often let down when things progress to the trust stage. The walls are firmy up i'm afraid and when they're not I am usually not far from a bitter blow!

Environment-7- I have had many crap places since starting a family and am pleased to say I am finally in the process of making a home now the horrible club has been closed down. The things that stop this from being any higher are: Even though finishing off the bedrooms which are the most outstanding areas of out home transformation are weekend jobs they have been in a state for nearly 3 weeks now and the fact that I am a country girl. Viewing my post 'The Gallery' will explain all of this in more detail but having grown up in the countryside I find the town not as safe, obviously not as beautiful and a lot more noisey! However, learning to accept these things and cleaning up my home could perhaps see this raise to a 9!!

Finance-7-I generally don't discuss money as that is how I am brought up. I have learnt to money manage and budget after learning lessons and watching other peoples mistakes. I have no loans or debts and I do not own a credit card nor any account such like. The nearest I come to is my Park account which I see as a great save than a waste. More money is generated by the wonderful other half working overtime when HE wants to or feels he needs to, otherwise we are good. Being a little less wasteful would put this score up one i would think! Also I take the approach of being lucky to have what I have compared to so many others.

Romance-8-I think listening to eachother more and making more of an effort would go some way in making this score higher. Another topic I keep close to my chest obviously but seeming as we have a wedding set for nex year I would say we are pretty good!

Fun and Recreation-5-We don't really get out much to be honest. As I said before I allowed myself to feel uncomfortable at a previous toddler group. The weather is turning also and this puts paid to my ideas of parks and walks (at least interesting walks) Other half is usually tired from all week working and I find it not so exciting being left alone another day! So I admit, maybe i'm lazy..I certainetly let my anxiety get the better of me which can ruin plans. I would like to enter into a more fun and free life!!

There you go, I can see clearly the things to improve, although this will be a slow process! If anyone wants to join in that's always great!


Cupcake Mumma x

6 comments:

  1. You've got some good high scores there with a few exceptions. Does any one area jump out at you as needing immediate attention or do you think that other issues such as your anxiety affects some of the scores negatively?

    Thanks for joining in.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi there and welcome to the Life Circle. I empathise with you in some areas - I've only just started to rebuild my self esteem and confidence after many years of feeling like the lowest of the low and I would cancel things or back out at the last minute - I still do if it gets too much.

    Looking forward to encouraging you on this journey we're on.

    Rachel xx
    http://www.motherofreinventions.com/

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm a bit like you in that I can struggle socially and could happily live without socialising. Your circle starts off from mainly positive points, which is good. Welcome to the LC!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi - I'm next in the list and I was really encouraged from reading yours - thank you! I agree with trying to "count one's blessings" and avoid being too negative - many of the people I do socialise with are rather the opposite and it's tricky not to join in - instead I'll try to remember your wise words in future weeks so thank you for the help m'dear!
    Menai
    http://menai.posterous.com/life-circle-week-1

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Thanks for all your lovely comments. Im so glad so many people understand the anxiety aspect, simple things for others are sometimes really big for people with anxiety.
    I think my personal development clearlu stands out but i can see how all these catorgories actaully link up and can all have a knock on effect on one or more area.

    Im so pleased to be part of this group, best decsion i made this year (second best lol) x Hannah

    ReplyDelete
  6. The areas where you have negative scores seem to be where you have recognised that things are actually within your control, such as the toddler group. Hopefully by recognising it you can start to make changes.

    ReplyDelete

We love comments!